clean house versus happy home?

The plan....It was the day before "back to school", I had soo much to do to get the boys ready. I had big plans to completely clean the house from top to bottom, organise all the clothes etc, prepare a lovely dinner and make homemade cookies. I wanted the children to be bathed early, pj's on, and I wanted Mark to be able to give them a blessing, we would read stories,sing songs, kiss them and tuck them into bed early so they would be well rested and ready for an early morning. That was my plan!!!! What actually happened?..... I offered to babysit for my favorite little 4 month old twin boys. I figured I could still get everything I wanted done, while helping our cousins out at the same time. Sooo....... I tried to clean as best I could amidst the craziness of 6 little people. Every time I got one project done, The toddlers had created a new one for me to tackle! The older two were tearing the couch apart to make a fort, while little Owen jumped on the oven door like a trampolene! Milo the dog made a suspicious puddle, while one of the babies let me know it was time for another bottle. It was certainly busy!!! By evening I was starting to get a bit frazzled, I could not make the meal I had planned on, because the oven door would not close properly (due to the previous jumping incident) we ended up eating taco bell! I was trying to fold up the mountain of laundry while Ava kept knocking over each pile. There were no warm chewy homemade cookies, and the children were not bathed and they did not smell of coconut lotion. (more like dried mud and smelly socks). Nothing had gone at all like I had hoped for. Almost at the end of my patience, I snapped at Mark... lets just get the blessings done! Mark pulled over a chair into the living room and began saying the prayer... I could barely hear him because Owen was hitting Ava over the head with the tv remote. I was about to completely lose it and give up on the whole idea, when something amazing happened............. I looked over at Kyle, he was quietly sniffling to himself in the corner of the couch. I ushered him over to my lap and asked him why he was crying. He told me he felt very happy inside and it was giving him "happy tears". He said his heart felt warm. He was feeling the spirit! Everything changed in that instant! Suddenly it didn't matter to me that the house was a mess, the oven was broken, we didn't have the perfect meal or fresh cookies, none of that was important any more. All that mattered were the precious little people who have been entrusted to our care. Their feelings, their happiness. For amidst the craziness, the loudness, the chaos.... Four little people are growing. They are watching us, They are following our example, they are building their own character and gaining a testimony of their own. I am grateful for yet another lesson taught by my child.

3 boys and a.....nother boy!!!

After three boys, I anxiously awaited the birth of my little girl, Finally, someone to dress up pretty, who wouldn't burp the alphabet, talk about farts or wipe their nose on the couch. She would be a little lady who was clean and polite....... hmmmmmmm........... Look What my little princess found......

introducing our newest addition....... "lizzy"

Me-" Brody, I think he is dead!!!" Brody-" yeah we know but we just want to pretend he's alive!!!"

I actually just said the sentence "can we please take the dead lizard off my bed!!"

Brody~"mum... it hurts my feelings when you say my friend is disgusting!!!"

Mum there's a problem.... I just dropped lizzy in the laundry pile!!!

Apparently the boy gene has taken over! I look forward to many more years of lizards, frogs and mice carcass fun! farts, wedgies, forts and smelly socks! I love my life!!!

happy birthday brodio

Brody is SIX!!!!! I can hardly believe it!! What a brilliant boy he is!! here are some pics of his party.

Brody is a wonderful little person! He has a happy nature and very playful. He is quick to make people laugh! He loves school, and is really good at football/soccer. He has always been a cautious boy until recently.... He loves an adventure, I took the boys to a swim park recently and Brody was the first to slide down the HUGE slide!! He loves to please others and is a kind hearted and sweet little boy. We LOVE our little Brody!!!

two birth parent reunions in one weekend

July 2012 was a monumental month in the fairy tale we call life. ***Ava's reunion*** On Thursday 12th July, Ava got to meet her birth mother and bio sister for the first time!! I was soo excited to see "T" and to finally meet Ava's biological sister.

We went over to Mayte's house and let the kids all play in the water together. It was very comfortable and lovely to spend time together and to see Ava interact with her birth family. Ava of course loved all the attention and performed to anyone willing to look her way.

We were able to have a nice big family dinner with all of the Pugmire family and most of Ava's biological family, it was very special to see everyone together. Ava's birth mother, sister and Puertorican grandma, grandpa, aunt and bio cousins were all there along with her adoptive family, cousins and grandparents.

It was just amazing to see how much love surrounds her, and how adoption truly is a miracle!

Our precious gift from Heavenly Father, given to us through the love of her birth mother.... we will never forget what we have been blessed with.

. . Kyle's reunion.... Bright and early the next morning, we set off on our road trip to Texas, to meet Kyle's birth parents. It was a long journey and involved MANY stops off at the side of the road, and several gas station encounters. We ate waaay too much fast food and watched aLOT of movies, but finally we arrived in San Antonio Texas. We arranged with Shannon and Patrick to meet up at IHOP first thing in the morning. The following morning I woke up early but it was still dark so I went back to sleep, I woke up every 15 minutes but I knew it must still be really early because it was still soo dark in our hotel room, finally a thought dawned on me "blackout curtains???" ooooooh nooooo.... I jumped up and opened the curtains, allowing the sun to fill the room, all of a sudden I felt panicked, we were late!! I urgently awoke everybody and called Patrick's cell phone to apologise and make a plan. We really struggled to understand each other on the phone with our accents. We decided to meet up at the Alamo.

there's a 2 year old in the house......

My baby girl is growing up!!! where has the time gone???? I have never known a child that has as much energy as Ava! She never stops moving! no exaggeration! From the moment she wakes up, she is busy busy busy. She loves to spend as much time as possible sitting in the sink (preferably fully dressed) she also enjoys water activities provided by the toilet (this also acts as a great source of drinking water!) She has a fascination for my make-up (preferably the more expensive items. I did give her a chapstick that she could play with, but this was not as exciting as my clinique lipstick! She loves cereal, it is a multi-functioning snack. She enjoys emptying the entire box on to the carpet and jumping on them. She also loves to be outside playing in the dirt, she takes off her clothes and takes a mudbath at any given opportunity. She especially loves to do it right after I have dressed her all cute and am ready to take her out somewhere. I am amazed by her speed! and her thirst for adventure, she is daring and brave. She is amazing! She is sociable and happy all of the time, she LOOOVES people, she adores babies and everything to do with them. She loves to give cuddles! She is always getting into trouble. She get's called.... monkey, tornado, firework, etc She is very petite for her age, weighing only 21 lbs. This makes it easier for her to wriggle out of seatbelts, stroller, highchairs,etc Recently out little princess turned 2!! we had to celebrate!! where would we be without our girl??? She is the life of the party and we just couldn't be more in love with our little Ava Grace......

having a bit of a pouting session.........

yummy tacos.....

birthday girl in a bucket

princess ice-cream cake (that I ate a ridiculous amount of!!!)

happy birthday darling girl

yeeeah more baby dolls!!!!

adventures in a public bathroom..........

This evening we decided to surprise the kids and take them to Amazing Jake's for family night. First of all can I just say... It is not quite so amazing if you are beyond the age of 7. (I am clearly several years beyond the amazingness of jake's) My children however, were having a marvelous time, and riding/playing/climbing everything in sight. It was in the goofy golfing area that Brody announced (rather loudly) That he did infact need to do "a poo poo" I could tell by his body language that it was an urgent situation. I left the 2 boys with Mark, and with Ava on my hip Brody and I hustled to find the bathroom. When we reached the ladies room, Brody argued that he was a boy and needed to go to the men's bathroom, it then dawned on him that he might not have time for this discussion, and fearing he might have a bigger problem on his hands, he gave up his debate and accepted the toilet on offer. Brody is a dreamer, Brody is a mellow dude, Brody is chilled, Brody is never in a hurry, today was no different! He sat on that toilet for no less than 20 minutes as he happily chatted through the door (and to the audience) about the history of some of his famous poos, he made comments about the size, shape and smell of several bowel movements, he told of one that.. "looked like a skateboard" I was getting impatient and decided I might as well use the toilet while I waited on "Mr Share-it-all" it was at this moment that my lovely, darling Ava decided to unlock my door, open it wide, and run out of the bathroom, Stunned, red-faced and mortified, I scuffled out the bathroom after her, buttoning my jeans as I ran laps around this "oh so fun" place. Finally I retrieved my little hooligan, I headed back to check on Brody's progress. He was still in the pushing phase. "come on Brody PLEEEASE!! come on!!!" Why is everything such an adventure with kids?? I love my little rascals......

I believe in angels...... yes I do!

Tonight after a busy Sunday, we just cleaned up dinner and put the baby down to bed. I settled the three boys on the couch with a movie and sat down to the computer for a few minutes. I was happily browsing through the pictures of Marks cousin's wedding, sipping my diet coke.... when all of a sudden I had an impression to "check on Owen!!" I kind of brushed it off (he was fine, just sitting watching a cartoon with his brothers) Then I felt it again... "Go and check on Owen!!" I casually went through to the family room and discovered that he was not where I had left him. I walked through the house and he was not there!! I opened the front door and scanned the neighbourhood from my doorstep... no Owen!!! I ran around the house again shouting his name. I could not find him!!!! I pulled Mark off the toilet and told him I couldn't find Owen!! I started panicking! I ran around the corner of my street, yelling for him, but he was not there!! Then I thought... "The car!!" I raced to the car, I tried to open it but the doors were all locked! but through the window I could see his bright blonde hair, he was lying on the floor of the car not moving. Frantically I scrummaged for the keys, and grabbed him. He was fast asleep!! I ran inside with him and gave him a big drink of water, The car was very warm, but Owen was perfectly fine!! "I don't like water!" he said sleepily. This whole experience had happened in maybe five minutes... This could have been tragic. I am so grateful to know that there are Heavenly eyes watching over my babies and helping me to keep them safe.

the parable of the dog.....

Almost a year ago, a scruffy, stray dog wandered into our neighbourhood and life. We decided to keep him on a temporary basis, while we tried to locate his owners. a few weeks passed, one family came to see if he was their dog, he wasn't!! Kyle and Brody stared at me with hopeful eyes, (they had just moved to a brand new school and were struggling to make friends) My heart melted. We named him Milo (after much gender, identifying confusion.) At first I struggled with him since he was not potty trained, he was messy, and annoying. One day he snapped his teeth at Ava! (she was sticking her fingers up his nostrils) I had had enough of him. He was pooing everywhere, and the babies were too rough with him, so he would get irritated with them. It was time to let him go. I put something on facebook, offering anyone a free dog. It was a few weeks before someone came forward with a request to have him. I don't know what it was, but I just couldn't let him go! I said "sorry, we are going to keep him after all!" Sometimes, he is annoying.... but mostly he is sweet. He sleeps every night on the boys bed. he loves company, and he guards the kids bedrooms at night. He is actually a good dog. And as hard as it is for me to admit.... I care about him! (yes me.... the one who finds even a goldfish to be annoying,) On Sunday, One of the deacon's came to our house to get the fast offering. He told Mark that a while ago he lost his dog, he then went on to describe Milo to the tee. Then he saw him and was sure that he was his long lost dog! I spoke to the young boy's mother, and told her that if they were sure it was their dog, that they should have him back. She arranged that she would come by after work the following day. I looked at my little Kyle who's eyes were red, with tears swelling up. This was tricky. The rightful owners should have their dog back. He was theirs! He should be returned. Their little boy missed him, he deserved to have him back! That is justice! But what about mercy? How do I tell my children that Milo was going to have to leave them? Then what about the dog? What was fair for him? Shouldn't he get to choose where he would prefer to stay? Were we going to have to have a custody battle over this dog? What would judge Judy do? Was King Solomon going to have to cut him in half? The next day, the lady came to identify her dog. All the factors seem to add up, same breed, same size, same gender, wasn't wearing a collar,...... she took one look at him (we all stared at her in anticipation for her dreaded response) but to our surprise she said ....... "nope, that's not him!!" "PHEW!!!" Milo was getting to stay!! I was not going to have to buy 2 hamster's to replace him! I am sure their is a conference talk within this story somewhere, but for now...... we are grateful that we are getting to keep our favorite dog in the world... "Milo Pugmire" To celebrate, we took Milo to the groomers for a wee trim....... I will add pics tomorrow (P.S when did I become one of these pet worshipers that write blog entries about their animals???") This won't happen again!

owen is THREE!!!!

Owen has been excited for his birthday for the past few months!!! He kept asking me~"mum, I almost big?"

When his big day finally arrived, poor Owen was not feeling well, he had a yucky bug that we brought home from Scotland. Owen was miserable and hot, so we cancelled his birthday party. :(


The next day we decided to take Owen's cake over to sunday dinner at grandma's house and call it his party. He was delighted!!!

Aunie Kierra made him a fabulous cake, which made the day perfect!!







Some of the kid's were eager to "help" open Owen's present's for him, and he would quietly and politely say... "I got it"




Owen is turning into such a sweet little boy. He is the cleanest of my kids, he loves things to be organised and tidy, and he doesnt like to have a speck of dirt on himself. He is VERY polite, he never forget's to say please when he asks for something. He has settled down from his wild and troublesome ways and is just a joy to have in our home.

We hope you had a fun day little man, we love you!!!

The long and winding road......

a story of grief, loss, pain, hope and deliverance....


We were married in Scotland (where I was born and raised). As newlyweds we moved to Mark's hometown in Arizona. So happy, so in love, we innocently made plans for our future together. A week after we were married I eagerly awaited the pregnancy test result! We could not wait to start a family of our own. Month after month, I stared at the negative pregnancy test willing another line to appear is if by magic. Some months I would take as many as 15 pregnancy tests, in the hope that one of them would give me the result that I so desired. I wanted to be a mother. Every part of my being ached for a child. I slowly began to shy away from social gatherings, everywhere I looked, there were pregnant ladies, every conversation seemed to incorporate birth stories, c-sections and epidurals. I didn't know quite where I fit. It was a very lonely time.


After a year of trying to conceive, the doctor began running some tests. We were told that it would be impossible for us to conceive naturally. It felt as if we had been stabbed in the heart!!!
A short while later we prayerfully considered adoption. We both felt strongly that this was going to be the path for us.. We began the rigorous adoption paperwork. I was obsessed with getting everything done quickly, It was a lot of work but my desire to be a mother was my fuel. I began creating a nursery for the child that I longed for.

In Aug 2004 we got a phone call from an adoption agency saying there was a birthmother that had liked our profile, she was due in a few days, we were told that the birth mother had admitted to drug usage during the pregnancy, and she was having a BOY!!! She narrowed it down to us and one other couple. I could barely take in all the information I was so excited. That afternoon I got another phone call saying that we had been chosen!! I was literally dancing around in my living room!!! We were ecstatic!

I immediately began packing, family members excitedly brought us baby clothes and essentials to take with us. The next day we flew out to Iowa to meet "Sandra" . When we met her, I stared at her pregnant belly, this was really happening!! I was kind of star struck, I felt so humbled by what this lady was about to give to our family. I remember admiring how beautiful she was, and could only imagine how handsome our new little boy was going to be. I was on cloud nine!

Early next morning we got a phonecall, it was "sandra" she asked me... "so are you ready to meet your son??" Tears sprung out my eyes as we raced to the hospital to meet him. "Sandra" place the most beautiful little baby boy I had ever seen, into my arms. He was wrapped tightly in blankets and was a warm bundle in my arms, I took off his little hat and felt his soft silky hair, I stroked his velvety soft cheeks. I could barely see through my tears, I kept whispering "thank you, thank you, thank you" to "sandra" Wondering why I couldn't think of a more suitable, expression of my heart. He was here, we had a son. We decided to name him Jacob Mark. Life was perfect!

The hospital kindly gave us a private room just off of the nursery, where we could stay with our baby Jacob. So there we stayed for three days, rocking him, cuddling him, feeding him, changing him, singing to him and making plans for our future as a family of three.

Nothing could have prepared me for the news- "Sandra" had changed her mind! She had decided that she no longer wished for him to be placed for adoption. I was completely stunned...... I was in shock! How could this be happening??? NOOOO this can't be happening!!! A social worker came to take baby "anthony" (as he was now being called) and he was placed with a foster family. Since "sandra" was still taking drugs.

I didn't know what to do, I tried pleading with the birthmother to reconsider her decision but this was not to be the outcome. We were completely heartbroken. We prayed to Heavenly Father and asked him for a miracle. We returned to Arizona completely defeated, devastated, angry, and vulnerable, pushing the empty stroller and car seat around the airport, with swollen eyes.
For days I would cry myself to sleep not knowing if I would ever get the opportunity to be a mommy. I was angry with God, why would he allow this baby to have gone into the welfare system, when here we were, a happily married, stable couple who were deeply in love with this little boy, we would have taken care of him and raised him well. What if he went his whole life not knowing that someone loved him? I would call the social worker in Iowa and ask about "jacob" but she couldn't tell me anything due to breech of confidentiality. There was absolutely nothing I could do. I would go into the nursery we had prepared and sob. I sank into depression, how could I find joy in my life without children? What was my purpose? Why did my body go through the monthly cycle of creating and discarding a perfectly good egg? Why did Heavenly Father allow babies to be born into bad situations, but He didn't trust us??? How could we try to adopt again? What if this were to happen again???? How could I be grieving for a child that was never mine?

Three months later, we were chosen by another birthmother. We KNEW we were going have to keep trying, in order to be able to have a family. We were ready to put our hearts on the line once again in the hope for a child we could call our own. We patched up our wounded hearts and headed to Utah. We drove home a week later with our precious bundle Kyle. We were able to take him to the temple and be sealed...... a highlight of my life.

We have since had another 2 sons, through the help of fertility treatments. Brody and Owen. And last year we brought our little princess Ava home, through the love of her sweet birth mother.







We now have four precious children, each have come to us in their own unique and incredible ways. I still think of "baby Jacob" often, and hope and pray that he is happy and cared for and loved wherever he is. I have learned that Heavenly Father is in charge. That he has a special plan for each of his children. It will happen on His time frame. I am grateful for the experiences we have had in building our family.
To those couples who morne for a child, I ache for you, please don't give up hope. Do your part and let the Lord do His. The weight of your empty arms is excruciating, But the amazing thing about carrying this trial of childlessness is........ when you are blessed with your child (however he/she may come to you) the trial is over! It is OVER!

911... what is your emergency?

Yesterday Brody and kyle stayed home from school sick. Brody had been puking all night, and Kyle had been coughing all night! I made Brody a little bed on the couch, and Kyle lay in my bed watching cartoons. I kept checking on him, he was coughing a lot and had a low grade fever. He looked really tired. I decided to give him some delsym cough medicine, to help suppress his cough and let him get some sleep. I read the back of the box. The dosage was the same for children ages 6-12. I was getting ready to give kyle some tylonol too, but I held off because I didnt want to over medicate him. He is 7 but he is quite small for his age, so I felt that the delsym would be enough medicine for now. He quickly drifted into a deep relaxing sleep, and I checked on him a several times (smiling to myself that a good sleep would really make him feel better!!)

About 2 hours later, Kyle woke up and came through to the family room and sat on the couch by me, he was looking a lot more lively and was very chatty. I pulled him onto my knee as we talked about his school project he wanted to get done. He did not feel warm, and was happily chatting away when suddenly (and in mid-sentence) he started shaking uncontrollably. I started panicking, shaking and screaming I dialed 911, I stumbled out my address and was crying and screaming to send an ambulance! At this point Kyle had stopped shaking and was now completely stiff in my arms, his eyes were bulging and fixed upon the ceiling! I was terrified!! "hurry please I screamed to the operator!!" I could hear her talking to someone else saying "I dont know what she is saying!!" When I knew the ambulance was on its way, I hung up so I could call Mary (my sister-in-law who lives across the street from me)
She came over immediately and calmly took Kyle out of my arms, He was lying there staring at her, but vacant. Mary got very scared and started crying too. I called Mark and he raced home and got here just after the ambulance.
The police arrived first, closely followed by several firemen and paramedics, Kyle was crying now and just wanted me. I held him while they took his blood pressure, checked his sugar levels. Kyle would not let them put the oxygen mask on him, so I held it close to his face. I was happy to see him put up a fight, it calmed me a little somehow.
Since he seemed to be more responsive we decided to drive him ourselves to the hospital (5 mins away). I sat in the back with him. He was too weak to walk but would only let me carry him. He kept crying and telling me he was scared of getting shots!! He didnt have to get any shots (to his relief) but he did get a chest xray and they did a urine test. They found some infection in his chest that appears to have caused the fever. The fever spiked rapidly causing the seizure!!

Mark and his dad gave him a blessing (a special healing prayer) he was blessed that he would make a full recovery. The doctor sent us home with instruction to keep him drinking and stay on top of his temp, with Motrin and Tylenol. What a day!!!! When we got home, I would not let him out of my sight!! I had him sleep in my bed so I could keep an eye on him. We checked his temp every hour through the night and he was great!! Today he has been perfect! playing outside, drawing fab pictures, and eating really well!!! I am sooo grateful that he is feeling better!! I am grateful to have such supportive family and friends and neighbours. Most importantly I am grateful that we have our little kyle. I love you soo much sweetheart, that was the scariest moment of my life. I am glad you are feeling better xxx

more funnies...........

Me:~ What would you change, if you were king for the day?
Kyle:~ I would turn all the healthy restaurants in the world, into Mcdonalds and Krispy Kreme's!




Brody~ I know why Jesus gave us families.
Me~ Why?
Brody~ Because he is good!




Brody~ I know what Jesus' favourite State is.
Me~ What is it?
Brody~ It's america!


Me:~ Owen did you hit your sister?
Owen (offended by the accusation) "NOOO.......... I kicked her!"

Me: I can smell something??
owen: what? my poop?



I was changing owen's poopy nappy when he asked.. "my poo-poo blue? I replied...."no it's..er brown" to which he asked "Sam Brown?" no sweetie, your poo-poo is not your cousin! what a strange conversation that was.

Owen's response to being told to sit and have a "time-out"
"well..... I got BOOGERS!" owen grant (age 2)


I was really impressed today with Kyle who did his homework without being asked as soon as he got home from school. ME: Kyle you are getting so responsible and big, I think you are turning into a man. Do you have a beard yet (jokingly)
Kyle responds (seriously) "Yes actually my beard is starting to grow" as he rubs his (little dry patch) on his chin. hahahhaha ♥ I love my serious boy!!!

Me and Mark were discussing our bouncy castle business, and were disagreeing about something..... Mark~ " no Beth, you are a nice person, but you just don't know business ethnics"

hahhaha are you kidding me???



I love my family!!!!!

i have funny babies

"mum.. I got fingernails on my feet!" Owen age 2

I was singing to myself " I- I love you like a love song baby" Brody said~ "hey mum, you sing better than the real singer!!" ME~ (flattered) "Really???" Brody~"no, I just said that so you'd think I was being nice!!"

at the christmas party brody was sitting eating his food when he saw his cute little friend "sadie" he asked if he could go and say hi to her... as he approached her, a meatball rolled off of his shirt and on to the floor in front of his girl. Brody looked up and said... "that was awkward!"

Owen~ here your hiccup mum! (handing me my make-up)

Brody~ "there's a lady at our school with a crumpled face!
Me~ "That is not a nice thing to say, that would really hurt her feelings!!"
Brody~ "NOOOO mum, her cheeks are really crumpled!!"

funny boys

sometimes you just fall asleep (with one shoe on) in the middle of the kitchen floor surrounded by cheerios! Life is hard!!!

If the wind changes will my face really stay like this??